Warning: Disappointment Ahead

This is a part of Hobbler’s Pity Party. For more info, click here.   Dear Fourth Grade Nathan, I hope that 1996 is going very well for you. A lot has changed since then. No, the Kansas City Royals are not any better than they were and first-baseman Bob Hamelin is not on the way […]

Another One Bites the Dust: Nathan Badley’s Last Post Ever

Hugh Hefner, dead at 213. Was it…. MURDER?!?! Well, it’s time to say goodbye to Charlie Sheen. Best known for roles as Charlie B. Barkin in “All Dogs Go To Heaven II” and Charlie Harper on “Two and a Half Men,” as well as absolute nut job Charlie Sheen in “The Life of Charlie Sheen,” […]

Being Charlie Sheen: Ashton Kutcher Set To Replace Him, Everyone Else Set To Continue Not Laughing

The hunt is on. Currently, Los Angeles is full of television executives combing every square inch of their studio trying to find the right person. The candidate must have a certain level of snarkiness combined with a willingness to ignore all of their nagging artistic principles for a paycheck. They will be asked to fill […]

The Royal Wedding: The Greatest Event in History

The world has gone completely mad. Crazy, bonkers, berserk, nutso. For some reason, we have all fixated our incredibly short attention spans on one event. The Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kathryn “That commoner marrying a royal figurehead” Middleton. Now, I must preface anything I’m about to say with one simple disclosure: I am […]

Don’t Worry. If The Government Shuts Down, I’m Right Here.

If you have read the news in the last few weeks, you know that Charlie Sheen has gone on a nationwide tour. After reading that magnificent tome, if you turned to the page that houses actual news, you would have found a crazy political story. It seems that our two political parties (the Dimocrats and […]

Chris Brown: The King of Bad Ideas

Being a singer must be difficult. Not because of the amount of work, but more because they seem to be incapable of controlling their stupid impulses. Take, for instance, Chris Brown. When we last left Chris Brown, he was eagerly trying to redeem his name, a name tarnished by the devastating proof of violence against […]

Celebrities and Tsunamis and Their Coexistence

I make fun of America a lot. At times, it seems almost an unnatural amount. The reason is simple: We are shallow. I’m not talking an average amount of shallow either. Turn on your television any night of the week and you are prone to see Entertainment Tonight/ Access Hollywood/ The Insider/ TMZ/ The entire […]

Block Charlie Sheen From Your Computer

     Two weeks ago, if someone had asked me what the two most popular phrases in the English language would be today, I would have said “Why are you asking me that? Are you insane, because that’s a very strange question. I don’t even know you. Please get away from me.” After that, I probably […]

You Want a Hit TV Show? Here It Is….

Attention, television executives. I have done it. After countless hours of research (or at least that’s what I call it to justify watching TV instead of helping around the house), I have come up with the perfect show. A show so big, the NFL will want to broadcast the Super Bowl AFTER it. To create […]