Lost In TV Land

Most people gaze neither into the past nor the future; they explore neither truth nor lies. They gaze at their television. – Radiohead Yeah, that can wait until later. I’m going to watch TV. – Nathan on just about any given day of the week   Ever since I was a child, I have been […]


“Downton Abbey” Could Use Some More Excitement

My house is full of “Downton Abbey”. Everywhere I go tonight, all I hear are British accents cascading from my TV, vaguely referencing things that at some point have happened in their home. I have no attention span, so this show is not a show for me. My wife has insisted that I would appreciate […]

“Bones”: Seriously? I’m Watching a Show About Rotting Corpses?

TV used to be so simple for me. I had a very narrow scope of what I would want to watch. If it involved a person eating an inhumanly large amount of food in a single sitting, I was in. If it was a show about modeling, models, how to model, how to dress a […]

Being Charlie Sheen: Ashton Kutcher Set To Replace Him, Everyone Else Set To Continue Not Laughing

The hunt is on. Currently, Los Angeles is full of television executives combing every square inch of their studio trying to find the right person. The candidate must have a certain level of snarkiness combined with a willingness to ignore all of their nagging artistic principles for a paycheck. They will be asked to fill […]

You Want a Hit TV Show? Here It Is….

Attention, television executives. I have done it. After countless hours of research (or at least that’s what I call it to justify watching TV instead of helping around the house), I have come up with the perfect show. A show so big, the NFL will want to broadcast the Super Bowl AFTER it. To create […]