When I was a child, I learned of a concept called “The Fruits of the Spirit” in Sunday School. After the inevitable Fruit of the Loom jokes crafted by our well-developed eight-year-old comedic sensibilities had faded away, we would learn that these fruits were the following: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and […]
Sometimes, eating healthy can be confusing. I mean, on the surface it isn’t overwhelmingly confusing. In fact, on paper it is very straight-forward and simple. Essentially, all you do is look at every single thing you think is delicious, make a list of it, then realize that every single thing on that list is terrible […]
It isn’t easy being a neurotic mess. Sure, Woody Allen made it look effortless in every single one of his movies. Larry David has made a career out of making neurosis appear easy. As a self-proclaimed high-strung nutjob, though, I can tell you that some days your mind has to go miles out of its […]
It was late this afternoon. I had been standing outside waiting for a table. I’m not a big fan of hyperbole, so you know I am telling the truth when I say it had to have been at least five or six hours of waiting for a table. After all of the pacing and standing […]
In the office world, there are only a handful of things to look forward to. You might get an entertaining email or two. There is the day when the cleaning people come and remove that two-week old salad and its stench from your break room refrigerator. There is the chance of finding a fresh(ish) pot […]
Dateline: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, 1776. After a great deal of tea-related bickering and the subsequent beginning of a war, a group of men have had enough. “I do say that these British brutes must be dealt with!” declared a chubby bespectacled man named Benjamin Franklin. In 1745, Franklin had authored a letter entitled “Advice to a […]
The other day I was listening to the radio. This is a fairly novel idea these days. Most people tend to have forsaken their terrestrial radios for Pandora and podcasts. Long gone are the days of people crowding around the radio to hear “The Lone Ranger” and “Little Orphan Annie” and the likes. I could […]
I am falling apart. My body is crumbling into nothing more than a pile of human dust. Granted, it is ruggedly handsome human dust, but human dust nonetheless. What is to blame for this human disintegration? Why, of course it would be my attempts at health. Months ago, I decided to get into shape. I […]
Once a year, the biggest and best warriors face off against each other. I should clarify. By “the biggest and best warriors,” I mean the two American football teams that were able to make it into the playoffs and then were able to make it past the wildcard round, divisional round, and the conference […]
It has recently come to my attention that my entire attitude involving animals has been completely misguided and wildly incorrect. For as long as I can remember, I have considered myself a dog person. The reasoning behind this was simple: I liked animals that at least pretended to care whether I was alive or not. […]
The Life and Times of Nathan Badley... 