I’m Sorry You Must Handle My Urine, Sir…

Dear man who collected my urine today,   It was great meeting you today. You seemed like a perfectly friendly person. Under normal circumstances, we might have become friends. Of course, normal circumstances do not involve the exchange of my urine. I wanted to take a second to apologize to you. It’s not that I […]

Look At Me! I’m an Expert!

I, once again, have been deemed an expert at something. I am, apparently, an expert at making sarcastic comments about the government and foresters that happen to play hillbilly music. My mother must be so proud! Alice Lipowicz quoted me in an article on the 41,037th most popular website in America, Federal Computer Week. It […]

Milk Helps With PMS? Imagine What Chocolate Milk Could Do…

Dear California Milk Processors Board, I saw your new advertisement online today, and I must say I was horrified. HORRIFIED! This ad seems to imply there is a suffering that we men have to be put through on a monthly basis because WOMEN seem to think that men are the worst people in the world […]