Entry From A Dog’s Diary, February 11th

Dear diary, It seems like I have very little to look forward to most days. I’ve heard that in some places, dogs like me do useful things like hunting. Unfortunately, the humans won’t bring in live animals inside and when we are outside, they absolutely refuse to let me hunt down and kill anything. They […]

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Dear Nathan

DEAR NATHAN: My son and his wife, “Carole,” have been married for two years. I was recently introduced to her father, “Ted,” who has been alone for 13 years. Carole told me later in no uncertain terms that I cannot have a romantic relationship with her father. Then she repeated the same thing to him. […]

A Dog’s Diary Entry

Dear diary, Today was another disappointing day. As the sun breached the darkness of my master’s bedroom, I became fully aware of the atrocities that are humans sleeping. To put it in a very human way, “Uh, dude, that’s gross.” Their mouths gaped open, leaving strings of saliva dripping out of the ever-widening facial orifices. […]