At some point in the history of the English language, someone created the phrase “The third time is the charm.” This seems to make very little sense. If I have already failed at something twice, it seems highly unlikely that I will suddenly be able to complete it that third time. I definitely haven’t had my third attempts work often enough to necessitate a common phrase.
It seems that I am not the only one who has had a lack of charming third times in my life. A couple of gentlemen in Australia would know exactly what I’m talking about.
Two Australian men spent a great deal of time hatching a plan for the end of 2012. The men needed money and, presumably after watching “Ocean’s 11” one too many times, came up with a plan. They spent hours planning a great heist, drew up diagrams, thought it through very carefully. Then they carefully launched their graceful and delicately laid out plan by attempting to break through a window.
As it turns out, jewelry stores do not have the easiest windows to break and their plan failed miserably. The first try was a complete disaster, but the phrase isn’t “the first time is the charm.”
So the men decided to be a bit more calculating. They looked through the neighborhood and happened to see a set of doors in the back alley. Since it was the back alley, it seemed that these doors would lead directly into the store, opening up a world wealth to the men. They busted through the doors.
There, they found Animal Welfare. While they had successfully found a lifetime supply of abandoned puppies, this would only make them rich in fleas and dog feces. The men were able to make the best of a bad situation, stealing $50, but that would not be enough to provide them a lifetime of wealth and prosperity. Second time down, one to go.
So, with one day to go in 2012, they devised the ultimate plan. They broke into a public restroom and, with a crowbar, began digging their way through the wall. They worked carefully but quickly, pounding away at the sheet rock. They could see their future, the yachts and caviar omelets or whatever rich people eat. All of it was just minutes away. With one final whack, they burst through the wall into…
Sure, they made the best of it, making off with the Australian equivalent of $2,600, but were promptly arrested afterwards. It seems that it isn’t hard to track down people who have tried to rob the same establishment three times.
Unless “the charm” is getting arrested for robbing a fast food restaurant, I do not think this third time can qualify as “the charm.” In fact, you could say it was a miserable failure. If they had just stopped after the second attempt, they might not be on their way to prison.
Plus, they would have had a lot of puppies. Who doesn’t want a lot of puppies?
This might be why I never bothered becoming a criminal. I would be that girl, busting through an Arby’s with a nametag on.
That would be a real shame, though they have excellent roast beef.
You always make my mornings funny.
Thanks for that 🙂
In French, there’s an expression, “Jamais deux sans trois,” which is essentially the antithesis of “third time’s a charm.” It implies that if two bad things have happened to you, a third is just around the corner.
That sounds much more correct.
Don’t you find it disturbing that a room full of abandoned puppies is RIGHT NEXT to a KFC?? Think about it….. it’s simple economics…
Oh, i see now – the KFC was in a different part of the neighborhood. Just shows you how my mind leaps to the most degrading conclusion…