Wife Talk: Football

English: Ndamukong Suh, a National Football Le...

English: Ndamukong Suh, a National Football League Player and well known giant human being. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s that time of the year again. Football has returned which means countless Sundays spent trying to explain to my wife why I insist on watch a bunch of grown men wear pads and hit each other. After the following conversation this last Sunday, I don’t think she gets it yet:

Wife: Why did that person get penalized for blocking in the back?

Nathan: Because it’s against the rules.

Wife: That seems stupid.

Nathan: Why?

Wife: The entire point of the game is to tackle another person to the ground. Any rules made to protect the players seem counterintuitive.

Nathan: Yeah, but the league doesn’t want the players to get hurt.

Wife: Then they shouldn’t play football. If they don’t want players to get hurt, football shouldn’t exist.

Nathan: But if football doesn’t exist, all of those players and all of the owners and the league all lose a whole bunch of money.

Wife: Sooooooooooo… What’s your point?

Nathan: That’s why the league exists.

Wife: Why would I care if a millionaire loses a bunch of money? They will still have a bunch of money after they lose their football money. Then the players can get real jobs like regular people.

Nathan: What do you think the football players would do if they weren’t football players?

Wife: Most of them went to college. They can put their degrees to good use instead of ruining their brains with concussions.

Nathan: If the players were to all use their college degrees, we would suddenly have 1696 people trying to find jobs as either sports broadcasters or PE teachers.

Wife: I knew history and English majors who played football.

Nathan: Are they in the NFL?

Wife: No.

Nathan: That’s probably because they spent their college careers learning something instead of lifting weights and aiming for their dream of playing in the NFL.

Wife: Well, football is a dumb sport.

Nathan: If you think that’s true, you should watch Rugby sometime.

7 thoughts on “Wife Talk: Football

  1. I am so in love with football. I mean truly with all of my heart in love w/ this sport. This is my favorite time of year b/c of football. Well that and b/c I live in Georgia and it’s not so damn hot I want to die. I’ve got NFL apps on my phone so I don’t miss anything and I’m addicted to the NFL Network. Last year, I got so excited watching the Falcons I actually fell off my bed. Yep. Love it. Can’t get enough of it!!!


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