“What to say when you don’t know what to say to a guy.”
This struck me as odd. I have never once written about this subject, yet people are still hoping I have some sort of information to give them. I suddenly felt an immense amount of pressure, realizing that hundreds, nay, thousands of future relationships were depending on my trivial blog.
Fortunately, I am a giver. For those women out there, these are the things to say to a guy if you don’t know what to say to a guy. They will guarantee that he will pay attention to you:
“You look just like an Abercrombie model, but hairier and more clothed.”
“Would you like this free cheeseburger?”
“I bought a piece of furniture but can’t seem to get it put together. If only I knew someone who could put things together WITHOUT instructions…”
“You seem like a dominant alpha male. You know, of humans. Not dogs.”
“I am so tired of driving my 1964 Ford Mustang. Its 289cid 271 horsepower V-8 engine is just so boring…”
“I just wish I could meet a guy who was into watching sports and eating nachos as much as I am.”
“Is this shirt see-through?”
“I genuinely think that any WNBA player could destroy an NBA player one-on-one and I will debate all day over this.”
“I liked ‘The Notebook,’ but for my money, nothing is better than ‘Die Hard.’”
“Hi.”
These things will guarantee that a man pay attention to you. If that doesn’t work, just stand in front of him. Eventually he will have to move, so you will be guaranteed at least a two second conversation when he says “Excuse me.”
Happy mate-hunting.
I’ve only used ‘Hi’ maybe I should try some of the others…
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funny, especially the “hi” part.
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That is also the best idea in that list, just FYI.
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” HI ” Hahahahahaaha…….
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