Yesterday, I wrote what I consider to be a witty piece about the drivers in Tennessee. In short, I said that they are not so good at the steering and braking and that I spend every second that I am on the road trying my best to avoid a fiery and unpleasant death. I am certain that, if my readership were larger, this would have been a very controversial piece. Fortunately my blog reaches an audience of eight people (four if you remove my immediate family), so I did not feel this backlash.
I was briefly concerned, though, that Tennessee drivers would be offended. The last thing I want is for them to get behind the wheel while upset. I thought that I might have been a bit harsh. They could not be that bad at driving.
Then this evening, I pulled into a parking lot. As I was driving, I saw a car whip out of its spot. The driver had opted to ignore the fact that it was dark outside, declining the option of headlights. I slammed on my brakes and watched them quickly dart through another spot, nearly taking out a handicapped sign and a cart corral.
Therefore, Tennessee, you will not be receiving an apology from me. You will get credit for stocking Diet Red Crème Soda in your grocery stores, but I will continue to be terrified of every vehicle on Nashville’s roads.
Maybe if everyone drove bumper cars…
That’s pretty bad. Be careful Nathan.
I will.
They’re hillbillies for pity’s sake. Cut ‘em some slack!
No can do. If I cut them slack, I get run over by a giant rusted-out pick up that is blaring Jason Aldean as it runs me over.
I don’t believe you re the amount of people reading your blog! I think there are more of us, maybe not in Tennessee though!
To be fair, though, most of the people in Tennessee are illiterate.
To all those from Tennessee that read that, I apologize. I would ask you not to show it to your friends, but they probably couldn’t read it anyway.
To the friends that actually could read that, I apologize. And congratulations on your literacy.
Come to South-Africa and get into one of our taxi`s. That will give u something scary to blog about.
No thank you.