It’s that time of the year again. Football has returned which means countless Sundays spent trying to explain to my wife why I insist on watch a bunch of grown men wear pads and hit each other. After the following conversation this last Sunday, I don’t think she gets it yet:
Wife: Why did that person get penalized for blocking in the back?
Nathan: Because it’s against the rules.
Wife: That seems stupid.
Wife: The entire point of the game is to tackle another person to the ground. Any rules made to protect the players seem counterintuitive.
Nathan: Yeah, but the league doesn’t want the players to get hurt.
Wife: Then they shouldn’t play football. If they don’t want players to get hurt, football shouldn’t exist.
Nathan: But if football doesn’t exist, all of those players and all of the owners and the league all lose a whole bunch of money.
Wife: Sooooooooooo… What’s your point?
Nathan: That’s why the league exists.
Wife: Why would I care if a millionaire loses a bunch of money? They will still have a bunch of money after they lose their football money. Then the players can get real jobs like regular people.
Nathan: What do you think the football players would do if they weren’t football players?
Wife: Most of them went to college. They can put their degrees to good use instead of ruining their brains with concussions.
Nathan: If the players were to all use their college degrees, we would suddenly have 1696 people trying to find jobs as either sports broadcasters or PE teachers.
Wife: I knew history and English majors who played football.
Nathan: Are they in the NFL?
Nathan: That’s probably because they spent their college careers learning something instead of lifting weights and aiming for their dream of playing in the NFL.
Wife: Well, football is a dumb sport.
Nathan: If you think that’s true, you should watch Rugby sometime.